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-   -   Parenting help needed....kinda. (https://www.fuelly.com/forums/f22/parenting-help-needed-kinda-11906.html)

Jay2TheRescue 09-13-2009 04:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by theclencher (Post 141485)
Dammit, it's not like there's a people shortage. Nobody has DUTY to replicate. :mad:

No, but it does seem that those at the bottom of the gene pool seem to have the most kids... I often feel that because of my IQ that I should have at least one child.

GasSavers_Erik 09-13-2009 04:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by theclencher (Post 141481)
If the only kids were planned, there would hardly be any.

Legacy- who comes up with that sap? The current bunch of ignorant rude obnoxious punks don't give much hope for that scenario.

Go visit a nursing home sometime and see how much kids care.

I visit/call my grandparents (those that are alive) about once a month and my parents have good relationships with their living parents. I have made many visits to the nursing home.

I agree that many kids turn out bad and dislike their aging parents or want to sponge their money.

GasSavers_maximilian 09-13-2009 04:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jay2TheRescue (Post 141487)
I often feel that because of my IQ that I should have at least one child.

If you're tall enough and reasonably healthy, you could look into becoming a sperm donor.

dkjones96 09-13-2009 04:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jay2TheRescue (Post 141487)
No, but it does seem that those at the bottom of the gene pool seem to have the most kids... I often feel that because of my IQ that I should have at least one child.

The bottom of the gene pool does reproduce the most. The lower the IQ the more kids it seems.

GasSavers_maximilian 09-13-2009 04:23 PM

That's a byproduct of the nuclear family. It's just harder to raise kids and accomplish under that system and the more educated are more likely to anticipate this and act accordingly.

bowtieguy 09-13-2009 04:25 PM

i'm looking at the different responses and i wonder how a child can be compared to a "project" or how a study can show "happiness", or lack there of in regard to parenting. behaviors can be changed...

i thought i hated kids, but what i really disliked was undisciplined kids. there are parents out there that take the time to raise kids of integrity. it bothers me to see kids that are starved of attention, and there are many out there.

theclencher is right tho', a child requires much investment, and not just that of a monetary nature. it's been noted by child psychologists that quantity of time is as important(or more) as quality.

theholycow 09-13-2009 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jay2TheRescue (Post 141487)
No, but it does seem that those at the bottom of the gene pool seem to have the most kids... I often feel that because of my IQ that I should have at least one child.

It's not just the gene pool, it's the culture and the way that they raise their kids.

GasSavers_maximilian 09-13-2009 04:32 PM

Attention starved kids is a huge one. Other than outright neglect and abuse, I see these as the top three parenting failures (in no particular order):
  • Not spending sufficient time with your child and taking enough of a general interest in them.
  • Inappropriately projecting your own expectations onto your child.
  • Infantilizing your child.

You know something's broken when you have isolated seniors and attention starved kids in the same society.

R.I.D.E. 09-13-2009 04:41 PM

I have no children of my own blood, so take my advice with a grain of salt.

I had a great childhood, both parents are still alive, 3 brothers. We are all fairly close and we take care of our parents to the extent they need our help at 84 and 88.

Its time to sit down with your wife and be totally honest about your feelings. just the way you were with us.

Speak from the heart and see how she reacts. Its a big commitment that never really ends and the result my thrill you or kill you.

My niece (wife's brothers daughter) and her female companion decided to have a child. The companion was artificially inseminated and the child was born with Downs Syndrome. My wife's two daughters have 5 children between them and they are a real pleasure to be with, but that is only part time.

I didn't want children, because I didn't see much of a world for them to grow up in and grow old. I actually thought there was a real possibility there wouldn't be much of a planet left for them after the events of the 50s and 60s, with the environment deteriorating and the world population exploding without my help.

There is a good argument for both having and not having children. The last two generations of my ancestors have seen the next generations shrink considerably, in many cases by 50%.

It also may be your instincts and core beliefs are a response to where this planet is heading and you feel like I did 4 decades ago.

regards
gary

theclencher 09-13-2009 04:52 PM

0, 1, or 2. That makes for a stable if not declining population.

I can't fathom why so many "need" to have more than that.

I can assure you, they aren't doing us any favors, and they aren't as great as they think they are.

And yes it's absolutely true that the further down one is on many measures, not just the gene pool, the more they duplicate. Why do we pay for that? It is the very definition of insanity.


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